Today, I did something unusual and put my hands together for a prayer. I’ve never been a religious person, but felt a sudden need to express my gratitude. As I stared at myself in the bathroom mirror, a voice came through me and took over. “This is all an illusion. Life in this city is not reflective of the entire world. People are here to get work done. This is what you’re here for. Work. Not gratification. That will come in due time. Do what you’re here to do, and then go wherever you please”.
It felt profound to hear these words come through me - words that I would not have been able to conjure on my own had I not vocalized them. It felt as though a hidden crevice, unseeable by the naked eye, had suddenly exposed itself to me.
My experience could be categorized as transcendental or, just very fucking neurotic. It’s evident that my subconscious is grappling with certain complications, and for that reason, it’s essential for me to be proactive about staying in the best shape possible.
My morning routine as of late consists of a few things. I wake up, and swish around a spoonful of coconut oil. It seems like a small gesture, but it’s impact is vast. Oil pulling as they say, operates as natural mouth wash. Truthfully, I’m not sure if it actually works, but it’s the little things we do to displays the honor we have for our lives and bodies, that delights the spirit. That enable us to push on, and sustain momentum.
I proceed to put on a beat and start free styling with a rap. Then I take a copy of the New Yorker, and read excerpts out loud for a few minutes. Then I do a minute long exercise where I stretch my cheeks so wide that I have no choice but to smile through my sorrows.
Neurotic? Yeah, maybe.
We pray, or exercise, or play music, or master-bate without taking into consideration all the other things we do in conjunction with these soul tranquilizers. Many times, it’s not the thematic substance that does the trick, it’s the little things we do in addition that creates the magic combo. It’s the difference between drinking whiskey straight, and having an old fashioned. The bitters, muddled sugar, and orange may seem like an after though until you try it in harmony. Suddenly, the confluence of the ingredients become greater than the sum of their part.
So do everything you must. If one idea doesn’t work, don’t give up on it entirely. Pick something else up and find a way to merge them into your routine. Pretty soon, you’ll be onto something both unique, and powerful. In my case, it’s talking to myself in front of the mirror and pretending to be touched by God.
(Originally published April 5th, 2018)